PROMPTuesday #7 - The Story Spinner

San Diego Momma's PROMPTuesday #7:

Thanks to the Story Spinner, I generated a random prompt that’ll give you a starting phrase, the setting, and two items to include in your story.

Here they are:

First sentence for your story: “Dear Diary,”
Setting: In a limousine

Two words you must include while writing:

• Missile
• Hearth

Dear Diary -

Another effing limousine and another effing premier. Who conned me into thinking this was going to be glamorous and fun? The accumulated days I’ve spent in the dentist’s chair for these perfectly pearly whites are days and hours I’m just never getting back. The time spent having hair ripped from my body and coiffed on my head . . .

I just know this boob-tape is giving me a rash.

To top it off my feet are killing me and we haven’t even arrived yet. Damn. I really shouldn’t be wearing such pointy-toed shoes so soon after my bunion surgery. Why do I subject myself to this? So I can wear those little strappy sandals with the diamonds on the red carpet for five minutes in MARCH? So not worth it.

I’d rather be tending hearth and home back on the farm in Iowa. I miss my horses. I miss my mom’s tuna casserole. I even miss my dad’s tobacco spitting. I miss EATING. And just look at this guy at the other end of the seat. Unbelievable, the guys they pair me up with for these things. The international heartthrob with the cavernous nostrils and nothing to say. Dumb as a box of rocks and gay as paint.

I hope the movie flops.

I hope the theatre burns down so I can turn around and go home.

I hope a stray missile lands on the limo.

I knew I should have been a French teacher.